Personal Reflection On Sacrifice

Today my blog may seem a little strange and certainly somewhat different than what I normally blog about, but my topic today is sacrifice. In our society today, what are we willingly to sacrifice in order to move forward a great cause?

I’ve often ponder this question recently as I’ve been reading a great story about some of my ancestors. Though not as glorious or well known, much like George Washington, Martin Luther King Jr., and many other heroes in history who sacrificed so much to bless the lives of others, my ancestors made great sacrifices for a cause they felt was worthy. And by so doing, they lived very rewarding, remarkable, and exemplary lives. In fact, I honestly know that their commitment and willingness to sacrifice so much so long ago, still blesses the lives of their posterity today. Again, I wonder though, what sacrifices am I personally making that will help future generations?

Each of us can strive to find a cause greater than ourselves and contribute to it by sacrificing, even if just a little bit, in order to move it forward. During the time of the revolutionary war, Thomas Paine so eloquently wrote, “That which we obtain too easily, we esteem too lightly.” Thus it is clear to me that sacrificing for a good cause brings with it great rewards and satisfaction in life.

As we continue along our life journey, I challenge each of us to think about sacrifice and what it means to us. I also dare each of us to dedicate ourselves to a noble cause that will require some sacrifice on our part—whatever it may be. I believe that as we do this, as we sacrifice for the benefit of others, we will grow, appreciate life more, and enjoy it more fully. And maybe, just maybe, our sacrifices will be remembered and revered like so many lives from long ago.

Feeling Tired?!

“Our fatigue is often caused not by work, but by worry, frustration, and resentment.”
Dale Carnegie

Are you tired? In our fast-paced and over scheduled society, just about each of us feels overwhelmed and fatigued. For some of us, these feelings of fatigue and exhaustion are a daily struggle that ultimately limits our ability to reach our potential and enjoy life.

So what causes fatigue? Surprisingly, one of the number one contributors to feeling tired is stress and anxiety. When you think about it, it seems to only make sense as stress and anxiousness interferes with our ability to get a good night's rest. However, too much stress during our day has also been proven to lower our energy level and our ability to be productive regardless of the amount of sleep we got the night before. In the end, these feelings caused by stress hinder our potential to be successful. Therefore, learning to control and eliminate our stress can go a long way in improving our energy levels throughout the day. Here are a few ideas on how to overcome stress.

#1 Think Positive

Dwelling on unpleasant thoughts almost instantly leads to stress. Rather than looking for the bad, focus on the good. Also, many things in life are out of our control; so why dwell on them? Doing so only wastes our time and keeps us from being productive. Instead, we need to learn to focus on things we can impact. As we fill our mind with positive thoughts and let go of the uncontrollable, we will feel more energy and motivation. And in almost all situations, there is something positive we can focus our thoughts on--thus keeping our energy level high.

#2 Go to Work

No, I did not make a mistake in writing #2. Going to work does in fact increase our energy level. Often in our sedentary society we make the mistake of thinking fatigue at the end of the day is due to too much work, but this rarely is the case. The truth is stress and anxiety result in low productivity, which in turn results in lethargy and fatigue. Thus fatigue at the end of the day is usually not simply a result of the hard work we have done, but it is more likely a result of stress. As we “go to work”, our mind focuses on the task at hand and pushes out negative thoughts. This causes our body to awaken and our alertness increases. Indeed, hard work will makes us feel energized!

#3 Watch Reactions

How we react to the uncertain, unexpected, and frustrating things that come up each day in our lives impacts our energy levels. Each time you receive unexpected news, or something just simply bad happens to you, how do you react? It is easy to have a negative reaction which instantly lowers our energy level. Then if we continue to react negatively by complaining, worrying, or questioning, we slowly reduce our energy level until we are exhausted. Learning to take a deep breath and control our reaction, no matter what happens during our day, will help us keep a positive attitude, increasing our energy level.

#4 Exercise

Regular exercise reduces stress and increases energy and confidence. I cannot reiterate this enough! If you are constantly feeling fatigued, down, sleepy, and distressed, and are not exercising regularly, give it a try! Regular cardiovascular exercise will focus your mind and remove negative thoughts. Exercising is a powerful way to boost energy.

#5 Know Yourself

Finally, find out what works for you to reduce stress. Each of us should discover one or two ways we can instantly lower our stress level, whether it’s by reading a book, watching a favorite movie, playing sports, listening to music, or something else. When you feel stressed, fatigued, and exhausted—turn to what you know helps you to wake up, focus on the positive, and lowers your stress.

So are you fatigued? Rather than simply blaming your fatigue on a lack of sleep or too much work, recognize there are things within your control that can help boost your energy. As you dwell on the positive, go to work, control your reactions, exercise, and learn to know yourself, you will be able to increase your energy level. And by so doing, you will be better able to reach your full potential.

Achieving Your Dreams

“You can run from your dreams in fear or you can run to your dreams with faith.”
Tina Downey

Setting goals is essential for getting ahead in life; however many of us fail to set perhaps our most important goals, or at least we fail to deliberately work towards them. The goals I am referring to are our long-term life goals or our dreams. And because our dreams often seem so far away or so impossible, we stay away from focusing on them or truly striving to reach them each day. Working toward obtaining dreams in life is certainly not for the weak, as it takes real commitment, focus, determination, and hard work. However, the satisfaction in the end is always worth the effort.

When setting our life goals, many times we are reluctant at setting too high or too ambitious of goals for fear of falling well short. Learning to put fear aside and setting a “super-stretch” goal for your life will help you reach your full potential. In fact, when contemplating our dreams, we must never place limitations on what we can accomplish. I sincerely believe the sky is the limit for each of us as we each have tons of hidden, unknown potential. I believe each of us is born for greatness!

To be successful in obtaining our long-term super-stretch goal or dreams in life, I believe there are certain steps we must take to have the greatest chance for success. These steps include many things we must do to mentally prepare for the challenge of obtaining our long-term goals. Thinking through and applying these steps will propel us to achieve our wildest dreams. So, before you truly set out to achieve your dreams, take time to consider the following:

#1 Take a Good Hard Look

It can be demoralizing and frustrating when we don’t reach our goals even though we can certainly learn and grow by simply working towards them. However, before setting long-term super-stretch goals, I believe it is important that we take a good hard look within ourselves to determine if the goal is something we truly want to achieve and are willing to work for long-term. We must be honest as we self-assess our motives and desires for obtaining our goal. Once we have taken a good hard look at ourselves, we then can move forward with the determination and knowledge that we know what we want. Without doing this first, we may set ourselves up for failure. And although failure is not always bad, obtaining the goal is still the objective.

#2 Once In, There is No Getting Out

Often people fail to reach their long-term super-stretch goals or dreams, because once the road gets rough, they abandon their cause. This lack of determination and endurance can often be linked to improper mental preparation and frame of mind before embarking on accomplishing the goal. As we set out to achieve our dreams, we must determine before we ever begin that we will not give up or quit until we’ve achieved our goal. Roadblocks will certainly come, but those who stay the course and overcome roadblocks will succeed. The desire to accomplish the goal must be greater than the obstacles we will undoubtedly face. Beginning with a “no getting out” mindset will allow us the greatest chance for success.

#3 Choose Passion Over Pain

Obtaining a long-term goal will most likely result in some pain, sorrow, fatigue, frustration, etc., etc. Thus, it is important that we are not only passionate about the goal, but that we are willing and prepared to choose passion over pain. When the road gets rough and we are exhausted, what will we do? Too often people give up on what they want long-term to settle for something more pleasant in the present. Giving into the pain and not choosing passion often results in unfulfilled dreams. Thus we must never give up what we want most for what feels good right now.

#4 You Can’t Hide Progress

Are you making progress? How do you know? Many times we say we are doing okay or that we are doing all we can to achieve our long-term super-stretch goals when it is not true. To best achieve our dreams, we must be willing to be brutally honest with ourselves, and make adjustments in our lives as needed. Thus, we cannot finesse or hide our progression or lack thereof. We must frequently and honestly assess our progress rather than try to hide from it or ignore it.

#5 Ignore Skeptics & Keep the Faith

You will most definitely encounter many skeptics along the road, however you must keep the faith. Skeptics will come frequently, especially as you begin your journey; however you must remain focused and determined to succeed. If you are not ready to face skeptics, then you are not ready to achieve your dreams. Though not easy, keeping the faith under all circumstances will give you a real opportunity to accomplish your wildest dreams.

Achieving your dreams in life will not be easy, but it will be worth it! Now that you’ve taken time to review these steps, it is time to go for it! As you spend time thinking about the items above, you will give yourself the greatest chance for success. And truly striving to accomplish your dreams each day will cause your inner fire to burn.

Raising the Bar on Recognition

“One of the biggest ironies cited by leadership experts is that the recognition techniques that often have the greatest motivational impact are practiced the least.”

Not too long ago I was asked to give a presentation at a leadership meeting. My topic was on informal recognition in the workplace—those spontaneous acts of kindness and appreciation we all hopefully share with others from day to day. As I’ve thought about the topic more in recent days, I’ve realized these types of acts are not only powerful and meaningful in the workplace but also in every facet of our lives.

No matter our station in life, we all have the opportunity to create an encouraging environment for others that helps build their confidence and that creates a sense of pride in who they are. One easy way to do this is through informal recognition. Indeed, one simple act of informal recognition can have a significant positive effect on another—and if one, think of the power of many!

Informal recognition can be as simple as telling someone sincerely that you appreciate what they are doing for you. It can also be as elaborate as making signs and hanging banners throughout your house for a child who accomplished a goal or for a spouse, simply because you love them. No matter how big or small, these random and spontaneous acts will add some spice to life, and it will strengthen relationships.

Regardless of what you do, the important thing is what informal recognition does for you as well as the person you are recognizing. Providing informal recognition builds confidence, strengthens relationships, inspires trust, motivates people to be better, encourages people to work together and collaborate, and lastly urges people to informally recognize others as well. The benefits of taking the time to informally recognize others, regardless of who it is, will have a tremendous impact on your relationship with that person.

Now during my presentation at the leadership meeting, I issued a challenge to everyone present, including myself, to “Raise the Bar” on informal recognition. To Raise the Bar, I explained we must do a better job at informally recognizing others than we’ve ever done before. We each made a personal commitment that we’d make a conscious effort to improve our informal recognition efforts.

At this time I’d like to extend the same challenge to whoever may read this. Whether you are a single mother raising children, a professional in the workforce, or a college student earning your degree, I encourage us all to reach out and informally recognize others in our lives. Though it may seem like a difficult task, because it will require effort and time, we can do it! And by doing it, the positive effect it will have on ours and others lives will well outweigh the exertion we put forth. And as we do this, we will become much better leaders and our relationships in our lives will deepen.

A Simple Strategy to Achieve Goals

Are you having trouble reaching your goals or staying focused on what you are trying to accomplish in life? Don’t worry, you are not alone! One of our biggest challenges in life is learning to overcome our own weaknesses. Often we lack the discipline and determination to follow through on what we want to accomplish. Our dreams, hopes, and goals in life quickly become simply good intentions and ideas as we allow outside distractions to derail us.

Often, these continued failed attempts at achieving our goals can result in discouragement, lower self-esteem, and a lack of confidence in our own abilities--causing us to doubt and question if we will ever be able to overcome. Having these feeling can be very frustrating!

Recently, however, I heard of an idea that can help us overcome whatever it may be that is keeping us from moving forward and achieving our goals. It may seem a little outrageous at first but it is simple and it works. It is called the Return and Report Method.

The Return and Report Method is simply this—you give an accounting of your days activities at the end of each day to someone you trust. Easy enough, right? This person could be a spouse, a parent, or even a best friend. Anyone who is willing to give you a couple of minutes each day to listen and maybe challenge you a little bit to push you to success.

To start using this method, simply share with your selected “helper” what you are trying to accomplish—your goals, and dreams. Then, each morning set aside a little bit of time to determine what you can do on that specific day to help move you toward your dreams and goals. If you’d like, you may share your daily morning thoughts with the person you will be reporting to later that evening. At the end of the day, report back to this trusted person how you did in moving closer to your goals. Inevitability, sometimes you may have to report that you failed and did nothing; however, other days you will report the wonderful things you did to move closer to your goals feeling a great sense of accomplishment, determination and satisfaction. Giving this report at the end of the day will motivate anyone to stay focused on their goals, holding them accountable for what we do and say.

Now, this method may seem extreme or silly but it works! Utilizing it in your life will pay huge dividends in helping you achieve your goals and reach excellence. How much more committed would you be to achieve your goals if you knew you had to report on what you did each day?

The Return and Report Method may not be for everyone; however for most it can serve as a simple yet very powerful tool to inspire and push us to accomplish our goals. Using this method in our life will not only cause our fire to burn, but it will also help us to reach our full potential and ultimately be more successful in life. Good luck!!

Do You Have Rhino Skin?

In his book, The Other 90%, author Robert Cooper suggests that we all need to develop the skin of a rhino in order to truly reach our untapped potential. The reasoning behind this he explains is because rhinos have thick skin. And, having a thin skin often increases troubles in life and distracts us from the bigger picture of what is truly important such as achieving our goals. The following are some suggestions the author offers in his book that will help us develop rhino skins.

1. Don’t Take Things Personally

It is an inevitable fact; we cannot please everyone in life. Nearly always someone in our life is upset or angry at us and that’s okay. We must understand that often when people are upset it is not about us but usually about them. Human beings by nature are also fickle, dynamic, unreasonable, emotional, and passionate and thus often distort reality, get caught up in the heat of the moment, or do not say what they truly mean. Taking things personally is senseless when we realize we are all human and we all have different opinions. Hence, trying to please everyone will result in unnecessary stress, and frustration. Avoiding taking things personally will simplify our lives and make us happier.

2. Carefully Analyze Feedback

It is easy to jump to conclusion or feel any form of feedback is criticism since so often feedback is given in ineffective ways and inappropriate manners. However, when receiving feedback from others, we must remain as objective as possible. We must strive to determine if the feedback truly is based on genuine concern and support as often is the case. With this feedback, we must discover, accept, and embrace the truth that may be there and then use that feedback constructively to motivate us to improve our performance and be better people.

If we feel feedback is blatant negative criticism, we should let it go and not internalize it. We do not need to let others weaken our inner confidence through criticism or disrupt our focus on our goals. And we cannot afford to be offended, hold a grudge, or try to get even when we receive this criticism since doing so will only slow us down in maximizing our potential.

3. Talk Straight

What this simply means is that we need to tell the truth as this is what builds trusting relationships. We also should not withhold information for fear of the impact it may have on others. By talking straight we will save time and break down barriers that often impede otherwise successful relationships. Doing this often means we trust others with our true thoughts, opinions, and feelings and this is scary because people will likely disagree with us. However, sharing our truth will allow us to be stronger leaders and live more in harmony with our true selves.

So, do we have rhino skin? Developing rhino skin by following these three steps found in The Other 90% will truly make us more effective and successful individuals and leaders. Learning to not take things personally, carefully analyzing feedback, and talking straight will certainly make us unique in today’s society yet it will help us achieve our full potential.

A Certainty of Life

Wow, I was reminded once again this week that one thing that is certain in life is change. Just when everything was running smoothly, BAM!, another unexpected change entered my life. Though at times change can be frustrating and scary, it can also cause us to dig deep inside ourselves to find that unknown strength and hidden potential within us. Change also often has a way of forcing us out of our comfort zone, challenging us to be better. Certainly this unexpected change in my life has done that for me and though I didn’t see it coming, I’ve learned from it. Below are four things I’ve learned on how to most effectively deal with sudden change in our lives.

#1 Be Prepared

Change can happen at any time and can come in many forms. Each day we should proactively prepare for change. This can be difficult as most changes are nearly impossible to predict but there are always things we can do in our life to prepare us for the unexpected. Unfortunately, I was caught off guard and was not as prepared as I could have been and therefore was reminded of this valuable lesson. As we search for ways to always be prepared, we will be able to handle and deal with change much more effectively.

#2 Look for the Positive

Unexpected change often results in stress and despair however every change can have a silver lining, we just have to look for it. Seeking for the potential good that can come from an unexpected change even when it is difficult will allow us to most successfully deal with difficult change. When I first heard the news of this unexpected change in my life I was instantly shocked and disappointed but I did not allow those feelings to linger as I quickly turned my attention to the potential possibilities this change could open up. Also, instead of only dwelling on the here and now, we need to think about how an unanticipated change may be good for us in the long run.

#3 Maintain Perspective

Though the change may be shocking and disappointing right now—these feelings most likely won’t last forever. And though the change may have long-term implications, overtime, it will become old news and most likely will not last forever. Again when I learned about this sudden change in my life, I first dwelt on the here and now but after a short time I opened my vision to what this change may mean 5 or 10 years from now. Doing this helped me realize the change really wasn’t as big a deal as I was making it and overtime will probably someday be somewhat insignificant. We must remember that change will not kill us and only causes grief in our life if we allow it to. Taking a long-term perspective toward difficult change will help us not only cope but overcome and conquer a difficult change in our life.

#4 Embrace it

Once a change has occurred, learn to embrace it by putting it behind you and moving forward. Though often we do not have control over unexpected changes in our lives, we are responsible for how we react and act to change. We do control our attitude and if we view change as an opportunity and challenge, we will more successfully navigate through it. When we embrace change we do all we can within our own power to make the change work for us. And each time we are successful in dealing with a difficult change in our lives, we gain experience and are more able to overcome future challenges.

Learning to be prepared, looking for the positive while maintaining our perspective, and then embracing it, will allow us to be stronger and more successful leaders when dealing with an unexpected change. As we learn from and prepare for change in our lives, we will be ready to meet much of life’s unexpected challenges and opportunities. Indeed, though we may not realize it at the time, change is often exciting and wonderful!

The Most Important Day

“Your performance today must come from a deeper place. No matter how hard, no matter how tough—you are expected to make a difference. Today are you ready, today are you at your best? So much depends on what you do today.”
Bronco Mendenhall

Today is the most important day of our lives. What we do today will be what we are tomorrow. Too often we procrastinate and say we will do something tomorrow or that we will change in a few days but often, tomorrow never comes. So what are we doing today that makes a difference? After all, today is really all that matters.

Yesterday is in the past and there is nothing we can do to change it. We must let go and move on learning from the past but focusing on today. Tomorrow is in the future and is unpredictable. In fact the best prediction we can possibly make of what will happen tomorrow is by viewing what is taking place today. Past and/or current behavior is the best indicator of future behavior. Thus, if we are procrastinating until tomorrow, it is a safe predication that we will procrastinate again. Thus, today is our day, the day to take action.

Just do it, is a famous slogan coined by Nike but I have another word to add that can motivate us to take action even quicker and that is “just do it NOW!” We cannot wait for that perfect moment or a sign or until we have more money or a better job or the weather changes, etc. to do those things that are most important to us. We must do it now. We must not wait.

Today needs to be our focus. We must perform our very best today so that we can have a better tomorrow. Today cannot be another day of putting things off or wasting time. Today must be the day we take action because after all, everything does depend on today. Are our priorities right? Are we doing the most important things today? Are we putting first things first?

What we do today turns in to who we are and what we care most about tomorrow. Each day we have the opportunity to move forward towards our dreams or goals or move backwards and that depends on our actions today. It has nothing to do with what is past and even less to do with future plans. Good intentions are never good enough. What matter is what we are doing now.

So, learn to live in the present and realize that tomorrow will never come. Do those things that are most important to you today. Do not put them off because we may only have today...

Effective Goal Setting Tips

I am so thoroughly convinced that if we don’t set goals in our life and learn how to master the techniques of living to reach our goals, we can reach a ripe old age and look back on our life only to see that we reached but a small part of our full potential.”
M. Russell Ballard

Goal setting is extremely important in our life as it inspires us to action. Indeed, for us to be successful in any aspect of our life, we must have goals. Therefore, it becomes important for us to set goals for every part of our life.

Often in business we talk about the importance of setting SMART goals. These are goals that are specific, measurable, agreed upon, realistic, and time-bound. Specific means they are easy to understand and provide a clear understanding and direction. Measurable is a goal that can be measured frequently in order to track progress. Agreed upon simply means that you made the decision and commitment to put forth the effort to reach the goal—it is something you want. Realistic means it is obtainable yet requires you to work and focus on it. Time-bound simply means that there is a measurement of time involved of when the planned goal will be achieved. Using the SMART acronym when setting goals will help you in developing effective goals that you can reach!

Another important aspect of setting effective goals is making sure they are aligned with your personal values, and ultimate vision or plan for your life. Make certain short-term goals will help you achieve your long-term goals and your long-term goals will help you accomplish what you want to ultimately achieve in your life. Setting goals that do not align with your planned vision are pointless.

One more tip for setting effective goals is to set the bar high. Frequently we underestimate our own abilities and thus set easier goals—however, challenging goals are good. Challenging goals will encourage us to work hard, think creatively, and stretch ourselves. Difficult goals provide the most growth and the greatest reward. You may also want to ask others what they think about your goals as others can help you raise your vision and increase your confidence. Also, to achieve goals, make sure you have a plan to evaluate your efforts often.

Finally, remember that the ultimate measure of success in goal setting is not always that we obtain the goal established, but instead that we put forth an effort and learn and improve ourselves along the way. Goal setting is essential for great leaders and will help us focus and stretch ourselves to reach to our true potential.

Living With Purpose--Part 2

“The greatest tragedy is not death, but life without purpose.”
Rick Warren

On Monday I wrote about 4 powerful insights from the book, A Purpose Driven Life by Rick Warren. Today I wish to continue by adding three more important messages to my list of lessons learned from the book. They are as follows:

5. Focused Attention

What we tend to focus on we become. If we pay attention to all of the negativity that surrounds us and our lives, than negative things will tend to continue because we will be looking for them. However, if we can shift our attention and focus our minds on the good, than great things can happen. We must remember that the more we think about something, the more it takes a hold of us and becomes part of our lives.

6. Avoid Short-Term Thinking

The author of the books writes, “The most damaging aspect of contemporary living is short-term thinking.” Short-term thinking causes us to sacrifice our long-term goals and success often for meaningless and insignificant reasons. Instead of only focusing on the “here and now”, we should look to how a decision will impact us beyond today and how it will contribute to our purpose in life. Today’s choices will soon become tomorrow’s results. If we can learn to raise our vision and understand our decisions today will impact our lives tomorrow and beyond, we will be more inclined to make wise choices. Today is simply the “tip of the iceberg.”

7. We Must have Purpose

In the book the author states that life without purpose is “motion without meaning, activity without direction, and events without reason.” Indeed, if we don’t have a purpose for our life and goals that inspire and drive us each day, it is difficult if not impossible for us to reach our full potential and really enjoy life. Creating a purpose for our lives gives us meaning, motivates us, and causes our inner fire to continually burn. Great leaders have their eye set on a purpose. Developing a purpose for our lives is crucial to our ultimate happiness and success.

As we focus our attention, think long-term, and determine a purpose for our lives, we will be much more likely to achieve our dreams. Following these ideas as well as the thoughts presented on my blog on Monday from this book will help us to be successful leaders and live a meaningful life.