Eliminate The 5 Destructive Ds

“Your chances of success in any undertaking can always be measured by your belief in yourself.”
Robert Collier

The number one reason many people fail to succeed is because they simply do not believe in themselves. They may act like they believe, say they believe, or pretend they believe but deep down inside they question their own abilities. This disbelief makes it impossible for us to progress and reach our goals. Thus, learning to truly believe in ourselves is crucial to success. So what destroys our belief or how can we maintain our confidence? One way is by avoiding the 5 destructive Ds.

Often, in the beginning when we establish goals we may truly believe we can accomplish them. However, as time goes on, things get tough, they do not go as planned, and we begin to lose faith and fall into a destructive pattern that I’ve learned to be called the 5 Destructive Ds. One D often leads to the next D which in turn slowly erodes our ability to believe. When we complete the cycle, we are left in a state of disbelief. Thus, when we feel our belief faltering, it is usually because we have begun to follow the “Destructive D” pattern. And sadly, many of us repeat this cycle time and time again. The Destructive Ds are doubt, discouragement, distraction, lack of diligence, and disbelief.

Doubt is the first D that begins the cycle to disbelief. Once we begin to doubt, our ability to accomplish our goals or what we want in life becomes much more unlikely. Doubt plants the first seeds of failure.

Doubt gives way to discouragement. When we become discouraged, our passion or desire for what it is we are trying to accomplish diminishes, and our ability to be successful decreases.

Once discouraged, it becomes very easy to be distracted. Distraction takes our eyes off the ball and changes our attention from what we want to accomplish to something else. Distraction interrupts our discipline and focus and knocks us off the path—maybe pushing us to an easier more comfortable path.

Distraction leads to a lack of diligence. This lack of diligence and effort completely destroys our faith in our abilities to accomplish what it is we want to accomplish. Once we stop truly trying, this ultimately leads to disbelief.

Disbelief is the final D which destroys our ability to be successful. If we do not believe, we will not succeed.

This is a very common cycle which many people tend to follow. Thus, understanding this pattern can help us recognize when we are heading down the wrong road. Once we’ve identified we are in this cycle, we must stop immediately and get back on track. Breaking out of the cycle immediately can restore our belief, helping us to accomplish our goals.

In the end, without a true lasting belief in oneself, our progression and capacity to be successful at anything is greatly limited. We can choose to overcome and avoid the 5 Destructive Ds with discipline, recognition, and understanding, or we can continue to follow the cycle that leads to failure. Don’t get stuck in this destructive cycle but instead, learn to eliminate disbelief! When we believe, we can achieve anything!

Effectively Unleashing the Law of Attraction

The only thing that stands between a man and what he wants from life is often merely the will to try it and the faith to believe that it is possible.
Richard M. DeVos

The Law of Attraction, as presented in The Secret, is a universal law that maintains that like attracts like. In other words, what we put our energy and focus on, we get—regardless if it is wanted or unwanted. Many are trying each day to discover success by using the Law of Attraction but it still alludes them. So what is the deal? Is the Law of Attraction a farce? I believe the Law of Attraction or at least the basic idea of it is real—when we focus on a goal, we can achieve it. However, reaping the benefits of the Law of Attraction is not as simple as thinking and hoping good things will happen. This is only part of it. In order to truly achieve success, our whole person must be completely aligned. When it is, the Law of Attraction works!

Our whole person, as explained by Stephen R. Covey, includes our mind, heart, spirit, and body. Each of these parts must be aligned in order for us to achieve our goals and reach success.

So first, our mind meaning our thoughts. As explained in The Secret, in order for the Law of Attraction to work and in order for us to be successful, our thoughts must be positive. We must truly believe we can achieve our goals. Being able to master our thoughts and visualizing what success will look like and feel like, will help us achieve them. Indeed, belief is at the heart of all success. If we do not believe, we will not succeed.

Next, our heart and spirit, meaning our feelings. We must feel it to be successful, meaning we must have a burning desire to achieve our goal. Within us there must be a strong passion and conviction for what we want or are trying to accomplish. This feeling must be real and sincere. If our heart or our feelings are not all the way in it, we will never achieve the level of success we hope to. Our feelings must point strongly toward whatever it is we want.

Lastly, our body, or our actions. We must actively pursue whatever it is that we want. Many forget this important piece of the puzzle thinking that meditating, thinking, and feeling will attract the success they are hoping for. Surely this helps, but sitting on the couch all day hoping for a million bucks will never produce results if we never actually get off the couch and do something. Thus, everything we do, just like everything we think and feel should be pointed toward achieving our goal. Our body or actions must be aligned with our thoughts and feelings in order for the Law of Attraction to work.

Once we learn to align our whole person, our mind, body, heart and spirit, I have no doubt we can accomplish anything we desire. Only in this manner does our whole person attract what we want leading to success. Thus, the Law of Attraction works once we realize it requires our thoughts, feelings, and actions. I truly believe that when our “whole person” is truly united, we can achieve anything!

The Truth about Mistakes

“If you don't risk failure again and again, you'll never enjoy true success.”
Steve Pavlina

We all make mistakes in our lives however some tend to do it more often than others. And I purpose that those who make the most mistakes are often the most successful. Why? Because making mistakes means taking risks and challenging ourselves. Making mistakes means we are trying to do better, and during this process we gain valuable experience and judgment.

Now what I’m not saying is that we should purposely make bad choices or mistakes to try to learn and experience different things in life. Rather on the contrary, what I am saying is we need to make decisions. These decisions should be the best decisions based on our limited knowledge. Does that mean they will be the right decision? Probably no more often than not, however when we avoid making decisions because we do not want to make a mistake, we limit our opportunities to learn, to grow, and to be successful.

In fact, those who are most successful in life have learned to fail. It is ok for successful people to fail because they know how it helps them learn and grow. They don’t beat themselves up or dwell on the mistake, but rather they are able to move on with greater understanding and knowledge. They realize that failure will not kill them and that it is much better to try and to fail then to not try at all.

Now, one way to help us in our decision making is to think about the person we want to become. We must ask ourselves, would our ideal person do this? Thinking about who we want to be and then asking ourselves what that person would do in any given situation will provide guidance as we make tough choices in life.

Also, remember that we all make stupid mistakes in our lives because often what we think to be the best decision at the time is not. The fact that we made the decision alone proves we have courage and confidence sufficient to make a choice and then learn from it. This ability will lead to success in life.

Life’s challenges give us experience and allow us to learn and to grow. We must take risks and move forward toward our goals making the best decisions we can based on our limited knowledge. If we learn to accept failure, learn from it, and then try again and again, we will be successful.