Giving Someone an "A"

Recently I’ve been involved in a leadership conference where I had the opportunity to present on a number of topics including team building, motivation, and organizational culture.  As I conversed with participants at the conference I couldn’t help but notice how quickly it seems we all tend to judge others and label them.  As I thought about the “labels” I frequently give to others and how I derive at such conclusions, I realized that in many instances, the smallest most inconsequential things many times leads to my assumptions. 

The problem with this is once we label someone, if we are their leader or parent or teacher, often the person begins to live up to our expectation.  If we say they are sloppy, then often they tend to be sloppy.    Not only this but once we’ve given a “label”, we tend to look for evidence to reinforce what we believe.  Thus in this scenario we would look for ways this individual is sloppy.  All of this ties in to the principle of what we dwell on expands.       

In our society, competition is fierce and I believe this is part of the reason we are quick to judge and quick to correct.  Rather than focus on all the good traits or characteristics of an individual we focus on the one or two things that need improvement and we speak up on these things. 

I’ve learned throughout my career in leadership that what we tell people they can or can’t do often comes true.  Therefore if we can see people with a new set of eyes and change our programmed mind to focus on the good and emphasis that, rather than the bad, our results will grow and improve.  Having someone, especially a leader, teacher, or loved one believe in you goes a long way in helping build self-esteem and success.  Thus as leaders we need to be careful and never underestimate or devalue the affect our words and “labels” have on those we lead. 

In the “Art of Possibility” by Rosamund & Benjamin Zander challenge leaders to “give everyone an A”.  Rather than assuming someone is a “C” or an “F” they offer that we should give everyone an “A” and treat them as such—as “A” students.  They explain that by doing this, our ability to see the good and potential in someone expands immensely along with that person’s own personal belief in self and in their abilities to perform. 

As leaders, parents, teachers, do we need to take a new view at others?  Let’s see the good in people, assume the best, and don’t make assumptions unless we are giving someone an “A”.  When we give people praise and set a positive vision for what they can become, we will be surprised by what happens.  Rather than focusing on things that need correction, let’s focus on the good that exists and the potential in all of us to be awesome.  By doing this we will be much better, more effective leaders in all walks and responsibilities in life.