The Right Approach

“Treat people with integrity and decency, and generally they will respond in kind.”
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In today’s society, the right approach can mean everything. Whether it is negotiating a deal, assigning a task to a co-worker, or even disciplining a child, the right approach is vitally important in all we do. Likewise, taking the right approach often defines a truly effective leader. After all, how many times has someone asked you to do something, leaving you feeling resentful, unmotivated, and bitter? The wrong approach is common and ineffective, and it often leads to unnecessary stress and contention at work or in the home. Thus, learning and developing the right approach is key to success in almost every circumstance.

Taking the right approach today may be much different than it was in the past. Yesterday’s approach of command and order is out the door, and it has been replaced with a more flexible and collaborative undertone. Using “you will, you have to, because I said so, because I’m in charge” needs to be replaced today with “will you, does that work for you, how about this, what do you think, and please and thank-you.” This collaborative and respectful approach will lead to greater results as you guide and shape those you lead.

Additionally, in years past the boss gave directions without question, but today’s boss must give more feedback to be effective. Most people today expect to know why they are doing what they are being asked to do, so tell them. Explain to them why what you are asking them to do is important and how it may benefit them as well. Tell them the positive consequences of following through and doing a good job. This does not have to be an elaborate spiel but simply a quick sentence or two. Giving a quick explanation will help others learn, develop, and understand why certain things must be done, and will encourage them to do it. In fact, with the right approach they will probably want to do it. This will build their self-confidence and satisfaction as well as their confidence in you. They will more readily follow.

Taking the right approach is not easy and takes discipline and practice. In you conversations, resist the urge to accuse, blame, ridicule, or belittle other’s responses, questions, opinions, accusations, or emotions. Instead remain calm and composed and listen to the input of others. This will allow you to more easily influence others to do what you’d like them to do.

Does this mean the right approach today must make you soft and give in to others? Absolutely not, and in fact, it can mean just the opposite, as it will give you more power and control over the situation. Though staying calm and polite is important, having the right approach also means you remain true to your convictions and talk openly, candidly, and honestly about your opinions and views. It means you are firm on the issue at hand but not on the person. You can disagree with grace and remain in control. As you take this approach, people will mirror your behavior and also want to work together rather than against one another. Taking the right approach will motivate others.

Today, successful people need to be professional and smart in all of their approaches to be strong leaders and persuasive within their roles. Doing this is important in any situation; so take a few minutes when confronted with difficult circumstances, and stop and think about how you will take the right approach to reach the best possible outcome. Taking the right approach will greatly enhance your ability to lead and make you a better person. Strive today to take the right approach in all of your interactions!